She spoke to me before I knew who She was. She gave me insight before I knew how to interpret it. She gave me awareness and siddhis, unbidden, before I knew what to do with all that. She showed me the whole picture while I was still young enough to behold it without burning my eyes or melting my mind. And She stayed with me as I grew up, always kindly guiding me like a compassionate Mama, as the world’s education and my own experiences grew over me like so many layers of clothing on a warm summer’s day.

By the time I was twelve years old, I’d already grown blind, so traumatic was my youth – so full of such utter shite. And I pulled myself through those trenches of adolescence, a picture of my Mom and Dad buried so deeply in a pocket at the back of my mind that I only took it out on the rarest of occasions for some brief succor. And neither did They speak to me. I was alone, made only more so for the gifts of my early inheritance. And by seventeen I was ready to cast off this life I’d grown into, take myself off to war and offer up this body on some noble battlefield.

Shortly before graduating HS, determining to go forward in a military career, I took the Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Test and scored so high, top two in the nation they tell me, that the recruit sergeant offered me my choice of station anywhere in the world as well as my choice of job training. Further, due to having applied myself in ROTC, I would immediately be eligible for officer’s candidate school directly out of boot camp. Well, I wanted to be an Airborne Ranger and I wanted to be stationed in Italy and I wanted to go into Intelligence after that. I was gonna jump out of airplanes and shoot stuff – killing people was somehow still cartoon-like in the back of my mind – and then I was gonna be a spy, a really cool one like Robert Ludlum writes about. And my dad and I sat at the recruiting station together and the pen was in my hand to sign the contract which had all my current goals written out in so much fine print.

And then She whispered in my ear and froze my writing hand. She tickled the back of my neck, stroked my brow and caressed the top of my head. Right there in that office, I sat still as a statue, recruiter before me, daddy to my right, pen hovering above the document, and my eye opened to a vision indescribable, but held me completely captivated. Frozen still, I witnessed a swirl of life’s potential and knew a happiness far beyond mortal sense. And when I came back to the moment I answered two bewildered stares immediately and succinctly. I told the sergeant that I’d be thinking just a bit further on this decision I was about to make and would contact him tomorrow. Never mind the surprise on his face – I’d been working towards this moment for several years after all. My dad was supportive and didn’t pry too hard. what could I have told him anyway?

That night She came to me. She danced with me and spoke to me directly. She told me that it was usually not possible to do that which I knew could be done, that which was usually not approached by mortal man. She told me to go forth and discover the Truth, to learn what a human life was for. She showed me a vision of my future Self and he was happy and secure. She raised me up and empowered me with confidence and clarity and fortitude, super intelligence and insight. She revealed to me what lay hidden and awakened what lay dormant.

And when I woke up the next morning I immediately called the recruiter to tell him that I would not be seeing him again. Called next to a travel agent and booked a ticket to Israel. I had a date with destiny and that destiny began in the desert.

My life is a long story of Awakening, of Kundalini Rising. So good. So beautiful. The least I can do when I travel this great earth is see to it that wherever I walk, the flowers bloom, the rains fall and farms yield good harvest. How else can a simple man pay such grace forward?